IRC Log: July 2009
Oct. 24th, 2009 03:09 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
tothelighta.k.a.: Claude-mun fails at organizing thoughts. THANKS FOR HELP BRO o/
this log also turns out to be about rabi, what a surprise
<Rabi> allen is doing such a good job topping us
<Claude> hahahaha :(
<Claude> I MAY HAVE LOST POINTS IN HIS EYES
<Claude> eye
<Claude> eyes
<Claude> yeah eyes
<Rabi> NAW
<Rabi> ALLEN IS VERY FORGIVING
<Rabi> also you're my bro thus he has to love you
<Claude> hey I don't want love just for being your bro :(
<Claude> my own merits!!11
<Rabi> its just a good start
<Rabi> youre awesome too
* Claude doesn't feel very awesome at all right now ;;
<Claude> HE IS IN A DILEMMA
<Claude> ...SEVERAL
<Rabi> HIS MORALS
<Rabi> HE NEEDS THEM
<Claude> WELL IT'S NOT SO MUCH MORALS EXACTLY
<Claude> UNLESS BY MORALS YOU MEAN "I CAN'T SCREW SOMEONE OVER TO DEADNESS ON PURPOSE
<Rabi> THATS A MORAL
<Claude> IT'S SELFISH :(
<Claude> ...AND YET NOT
<Claude> AND YET YES
<Rabi> RABI DOESNT MIND
<Claude> THAT IS A PROBLEM
<Rabi> I WONT MAKE YOUR DECISIONS FOR YOU
<Rabi> Unless its a decision like WHO GOES UP FOR DYINGS
<Rabi> then he'll try to make that decision for you sometimes
<Rabi> ...but even then he's been pretty respectful with 'sharing' actually
<Claude> ...BUT THEN HE ENDS UP SPONTANEOUSLY COMBUSTING
<Rabi> sob
<Claude> haha he gets to make decisions and he can't do it
<Claude> :(
<Rabi> they both kinda fail at decisions
<Claude> HIS OWN PUNISHMENT
<Claude> yeah
<Rabi> rabi can make decisions like lets go this way, lets act this way, lets be friendly
<Rabi> but sucks at real decisions like
<Claude> "oh fuck a high-wire situation JUST WALK AWAY~"
<Rabi> how to deal with death and BREAKING etc
* Rabi IGNORES IGNORES IGNORES ITS ALL OKAY
<Claude> ...see claude's problem is
<Claude> ...
<Claude> okay
<Claude> if claude had never met rabi
<Rabi> god forbid
<Claude> he probably would've adopted rabi's way of dealing
<Claude> with this
<Rabi> ...ppfftthahaha
<Claude> :(
<Rabi> whyzat
<Claude> SMILE AND PRETEND IT'S ALL OKAY
<Claude> cause
<Claude> it's
<Claude> easier
<Rabi> ISNT IT \o/
<Claude> than facing up to THE TRUUUUTH
<Rabi> but I guess seeing Rabi do it and all...
<Claude> y-yeah
<Claude> and it's hilarious cause
<Claude> that time when Claude was all YOU SHOULDN'T HIDE BEHIND A SMILE at Rabi he. really hadn't had to deal with any
<Claude> uh
<Claude> ...what do you call what happened on Day 31
<Claude> ...
<Claude> HOPELESS SITUATIONS before
<Rabi> hahaha yeah
<Claude> like
<Rabi> PRETTY HOPELESS
<Claude> HE WAS TALKING OUT OF HIS NAIVE WHITEBREAD ASS :(
<Rabi> actually the saddest part was for rabi it wasnt ENTIRELY hopeless he probably would have won
<Rabi> if he didnt ask for lucky to be spared
<Rabi> but cepheus is full of retarded and sacrificing
<Claude> yeah I
<Claude> ...you know claude thinks you would've done that for anyone who didn't wanna die :(
<Claude> not just girls
<Claude> though lol othar
<Rabi> It would depend on the person
<Rabi> I think he wouldn't have with ya know
<Rabi> Zack
<Rabi> or Othar
<Rabi> or someone older than him
<Claude> yeah zack
<Rabi> but for like allen or scowl he would
<Rabi> he wouldnt for thorfinn
<Claude> I think if it came down to rabi or zack
<Claude> maybe claude would've actually voted for zack
<Rabi> Rabi woulda lived
<Rabi> cuz rabi is actually scared of dying
<Rabi> a lot
<Rabi> Because like uhm I think Peter brought up in main chan
<Claude> but partly because nothing seemed to happen when claude put false votes in he thought "right I can keep doing this :/"
<Rabi> PERFECT MEMORY = VIVID RECOLLECTIONS
<Claude> s-sob
<Claude> I THINK CLAUDE HAS FIGURED THAT AT SOME POINT
<Rabi> But he also hates seeing other people die because HE RECALLS THAT VIVIDLY TOO he can't win
<Rabi> yeah in one of your things you went lol nightmares
<Rabi> Rabi has awful nightmares
<Claude> ;;
<Rabi> He prefers to nap instead of long sleeps, less dreams that way
<Claude> haha after this so will claude
<Claude> but his will be more like
<Claude> dreams of possible future killgames
<Rabi> DUSKY VERSUS SPIKY
<Rabi> NIGHTMARE MODE
<Claude> HAHAHA :(
<Claude> day 33 he'll probably wake up crying
<Rabi> ;.; bro
<Rabi> bro so broken
<Claude> WHAT DO YOU DO IN AN IMPOSSIBLE SITUATION even with what allen said how do you. cheat. In this kind of thing.
<Claude> how do you cheat omnipotent cheaters :(
<Rabi> YOU CANT
<Claude> EXACTLY
<Rabi> rabi is all uugghh cuz Allen is like PROMISE TO NEVER BREAK
<Rabi> and he's like christ that'd be such a huge lie even *I* have problems saying it
<Claude> ....bro ._.
<Rabi> Cuz ya know Rabi's very...sensible. Like he has ANGER and FEELINGS but he recognizes a hopeless and helpless situation when he sees it
<Rabi> Which is why he didn't get riled up during the game
<Rabi> Getting mad wouldnt help and just make him hurt himself because he'd wanna punch shit if he got worked up
<Claude> yeah claude is actually pretty sensible even if he can't be unemotional about it
<Claude> which is why he can't just buy into allen's "SO WHAT" solution so easily
<Rabi> They've also been in way more kill games
<Claude> because then he still has to solve the situation directly :(
<Rabi> and claude especially has. seen rabi die a lot
<Claude> actually
<Rabi> no wait you have missed some huh
<Claude> going back
<Rabi> the eye thing sob
<Claude> he saw you die once
<Claude> he missed the eye thing but HEARD ABOUT IT
<Rabi> that scared him a lot the eye one
<Claude> even if no one would tell him how exactly it happened
<Rabi> and he was so terrified that he'd get the brain parasites in that game sob
<Claude> and then third trickster game he died :(
<Claude> lol yeah
<Rabi> cuz his brain is his importantest part
<Claude> claude doesn't have a grudge against rezo cause. it was probably the best option on the list left.
<Rabi> BRAIN AND EYES
<Rabi> NEED
<Claude> broooo ;;
<Rabi> right now rabi is so worried about claude
<Claude> rabi knows he didn't actually vote for anyone in the end right
<Claude> or did he not clarify that
<Rabi> Rabi figures as much
<Rabi> or something
<Rabi> well no he saw you 'voting'
<Rabi> hmm
<Claude> but then when he woke up claude mentioned that he thought you got screwed over cause 'he didn't vote'
<Claude> though
<Rabi> hmm then he knows for sure
<Claude> you could take that either as 'didn't vote at all' or 'didn't vote in the first stages'
<Rabi> and would assum rude notes
<Claude> trickster makes claude so rude :(
<Claude> HE STARTED AS A NICE BOY
<Rabi> ...I think thats the least of your problems bro
<Claude> ...shhh the least are the easiest to address
<Rabi> :|
<Rabi> SO BACK TO YOUR BREAKING
<Claude> YES WELL
<Claude> I FIGURE HE WILL AT LEAST DECIDE or has already decided THAT HE CAN'T BREAK COMPLETELY
<Claude> cause that would hurt rabi
<Claude> and like
<Rabi> They're both hanging on entirely because of each other
<Claude> ...CODEPENDENCY ACHIEVES NEXT LEVEL /o/
<Claude> yeah like
<Claude> ...man I just keep quoting that manga except
<Claude> Claude is a weak guy
<Claude> but he'll do his best to be strong if there's someone counting on him to
<Claude> and he knows that if he let himself become something different from what he is, it would affect others
<Claude> and he's afraid that here, "something different" would be closer and closer to That Claude
<Rabi> The WTF Hurting Red Claude?
<Claude> (yes tavi told him IT'S PROBABLY ENTIRELY MADE UP but it still scared the hell out of him to see a Himself like that)
<Claude> yeah :(
<Claude> and
<Claude> ...if he lets himself think about it now he might even be able to see how he could turn out that way
<Claude> "if I stopped caring about people getting hurt"
<Rabi> oh bro
<Rabi> You're too introspective :(
<Claude> "if I just got focused on getting things over with"
<Claude> ...hey he's not normally introspective cause he keeps hiumself busy :(
<Claude> but he's had ALL NIGHT LONG to mull to himself
<Rabi> YOU SHOULDA SLEPT :(
<Claude> while waiting for surgeon
<Claude> WHAT IF SURGEON SHOWED UP :(
<Claude> AND I WAS ASLEEP
<Claude> AND HE WAS LIKE "oh I'll come back later"
<Rabi> ...bro orz
<Claude> he wanted you back asap okay ._.
<Rabi> :(
<Claude> for one thing he had no idea how long dusky could be distracted
<Claude> :(
<Rabi> so he's worried if he doesnt do things the same retarded way he's doing things
<Rabi> he'll become psychotic
<Claude> ...it might take a long time or a very long time
<Claude> but he doesn't want to become jaded
<Claude> or hmm how do I put this
<Rabi> in words i hope
<Claude> ...what were you expecting dance
<Rabi> an artisic rendering?
<Rabi> this dark circle represents depair
<Claude> here you can work with this
<Claude> http://www.pixiv.net/member_illust.php?mode=medium&illust_id=2449010
<Claude> but no I WILL TRY TO WORDS
<Claude> okay if he doesn't do things the same retarded way he'd been doing things
<Claude> he worries he'll start getting used to it
<Rabi> ...like his retarded bro?
<Claude> and that will change who he is ONE STEP CLOSER TO PSYCHOTIC maybe but when he thinks about that BAD END he starts slamming down the 'can't do that red will break' partition
<Claude> ...he's sure his retarded bro feels it under there :(
<Rabi> Cling to sanity for my sake \o/
<Claude> and added with the fact that the old "everyone revives straight after" standby has been shaken
<Rabi> rabi got stiff like a normal dead body
<Claude> dying in a game is now more serious than ever
<Rabi> it was probably very creepy \o/
<Claude> ....oh god
<Claude> he probably had to forcibly rearrange your limbs :(
<Claude> at some point
<Claude> OKAY I NEED TO RUN TO CHURCH AND DINNER DATE NOW be back in hours CONTINUE LATER?
<Rabi> SURE
<Claude> <333333333
<Rabi> FARE THEE WELL
<Claude> SHOULD BE BACK BY ELEVEN
<Claude> which is your five iirc
<Claude|out> o>
<Claude> WHERE WAS I
<Claude> uh
<Almaz> I DUNNO
<Claude> ...RIGHT
<Claude> HE WILL CLING TO SANITY FOR YOUR SAKE is the first conclusion
<Claude> :<b
<Almaz> YES
<Claude> but the problem is how
<Claude> IT IS ANOTHER PARADOX
<Claude> letting things not destroy his sanity = becoming numb = becoming NOT-HIM
<Claude> man maybe he needs to find an outlet or something for this :<a
<Almaz> Punching Nora?
<Claude> ...also to be honest he's not exactly unafraid of death either
<Claude> he's not that jesusy
<Claude> but so far he's been lucky enough not to actually go through a horrible one
<Claude> so it's not so prominent yet
<Almaz> hahahaha and rabi hasn't died too horribly has he
<Almaz> in front of him, anyway
<Claude> PROBABLY IF HE DIES IN A BAD WAY in future it will....make decisions even more complicated
<Claude> YOU BLED OUT
<Claude> AND HE HEARD THE OTHER ONE WAS BAD
<Claude> >(
<Almaz> YOU DIDNT SEE IT LA LA LA
<Claude> DON'T THINK I DON'T KNOW IT BOTHERS YOU :(
<Almaz> YOU DONT :D
<Claude> YOU DON'T SLEEP WELL
<Almaz> ....SO?
<Claude> ...SO YOU'RE BOTHERED :(
<Almaz> ANYWAY YOUR TRAUMA
<Claude> YEAH MY TRAUMA
<Claude> IT HURTS MY BRAIN
<Claude> AND ALLEN IS NAIVE :(
<Almaz> daaawww
<Claude> actually a short sum up would be
<Claude> <Rabi> so he's worried if he doesnt do things the same retarded way he's doing things <Rabi> he'll become psychotic
<Claude> but if he does do things the same retarded way he's doing things
<Claude> he'll...still... go crazy
<Claude> but he can't
<Almaz> ...lol epic fail
<Claude> but he might eventually
<Claude> but he can't!!!
<Claude> SOMETHING HAS TO GIVE :(
<Claude> ...shut up you're no b etter
<Almaz> ...wut
<Claude> lol distracted by threads :(
<Claude> right at this point he will... do lots of things in daily life so he doesn't have to think about the dilemma!!1
<Claude> but when it comes to another trickster game
<Claude> multiple options
<Claude> a) decides WHAT IF RED DIES FOR GOOD THIS TIME and picks someone else because of it to save him at all costs
<Claude> b) gets in the damn jar himself and gets Allen or someone to make sure Rabi doesn't watch :/a
<Claude> c) freezes again
<Almaz> s..sob
<Claude> d) picks whoever he's told to so he can avoid making the choice (lol)
<Almaz> rabi so doesn't wanna die again
<Almaz> but! claude and dusky!
<Claude> e) picks someone on his own accord and hates himself for it
<Claude> YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO DIE AGAIN FOR A LONG LONG TIME
<Claude> 8(
<Almaz> He WOULD prefer that
<Claude> I think at this point b) is the most likely option
<Claude> if possible
<Claude> :/a
<Claude> cause YOU DIE TOO MUCH
<Claude> and
<Claude> idk he'd still hate himself a lot cause then he'd be putting you in HIS position
<Almaz> Rabi would...respect Claude's decision to do it but not like it
<Claude> of having to pick people :(
<Almaz> Rabi could handle it way better
<Claude> but he thinks you're stronger
<Claude> in that sense
<Almaz> He's not stronger so much as he can just
<Almaz> turn it off easier
<Claude> or maybe just really good at pretending HE IS NOT SURE
<Claude> ...haha then he'd feel horrible for doing things that you can only deal with by turning it off
<Claude> IS THERE NO WAY TO WIN THIS
<Almaz> yeah I can imagine him like realizing rabi is acting like he did the first time he saw the pillar
<Almaz> and being like SHIT SHIT
<Almaz> maybe allen will punch me for you
<Claude> it's not maybe
<Claude> I trust he will :(
<Claude> do I save your body and mind or your heart, bro
<Claude> sob
<Almaz> ...o..oh claude hahahaha
<Claude> SO IMPORTANT TO HIM
<Claude> he's in an unknown world for an unknown reason and everything is new
<Claude> to survive he needs peopleeee
<Claude> friendss
<Almaz> RABI WILL...........MANAGE
<Claude> because they give him a reason to wake up in the morning
<Claude> .:(
<Claude> WORST CASE SCENARIO: Claude is abandoned, zones out forever
<Claude> ...yeah I think the only conclusion he can firmly accept right now is "can't break, red and dusky need me"
<Almaz> we're so dependent
<Claude> and work around that
<Claude> yeah we are :(
<Almaz> l..lol
<Claude> HOW DID THIS HAPPEN
<Claude> it is a beautiful thing and also a terrible thing
<Almaz> WELL what else do they have
<Almaz> in other teams its all kinda spread out
<Almaz> while theyre kinda only can depend on each other
<Almaz> cuz it was...dusky and silver
<Claude> ...true :<a
<Almaz> So they were relying on each other a lot
<Claude> two other members who are more dependents than dependable
<Almaz> Yeah so they kinda did...have to be parent types
<Almaz> and act as a unit together
<Claude> it actually was a pretty healthy dependency but at this rate it might develop into a stronger unhealthier one
<Claude> if it isn't already
<Claude> cause of all the pressure :(
<Almaz> I dunno, they need SOMETHING to cling to
<Almaz> and at least we OOCly know like
<Almaz> neither of them will pillar
<Almaz> ever
<Almaz> Which would be the thing that'd really destroy either of them
<Almaz> as long as they keep coming back they can keep pushing on
<Claude> yeah :<
<Claude> DON'T PILLAR OKAY
<Claude> ...okay I think I'm ready to go back to allen's thread now
<Claude> sob
<Claude> THANK YOU BRO
<Almaz> NO PROB
this log also turns out to be about rabi, what a surprise
<Rabi> allen is doing such a good job topping us
<Claude> hahahaha :(
<Claude> I MAY HAVE LOST POINTS IN HIS EYES
<Claude> eye
<Claude> eyes
<Claude> yeah eyes
<Rabi> NAW
<Rabi> ALLEN IS VERY FORGIVING
<Rabi> also you're my bro thus he has to love you
<Claude> hey I don't want love just for being your bro :(
<Claude> my own merits!!11
<Rabi> its just a good start
<Rabi> youre awesome too
* Claude doesn't feel very awesome at all right now ;;
<Claude> HE IS IN A DILEMMA
<Claude> ...SEVERAL
<Rabi> HIS MORALS
<Rabi> HE NEEDS THEM
<Claude> WELL IT'S NOT SO MUCH MORALS EXACTLY
<Claude> UNLESS BY MORALS YOU MEAN "I CAN'T SCREW SOMEONE OVER TO DEADNESS ON PURPOSE
<Rabi> THATS A MORAL
<Claude> IT'S SELFISH :(
<Claude> ...AND YET NOT
<Claude> AND YET YES
<Rabi> RABI DOESNT MIND
<Claude> THAT IS A PROBLEM
<Rabi> I WONT MAKE YOUR DECISIONS FOR YOU
<Rabi> Unless its a decision like WHO GOES UP FOR DYINGS
<Rabi> then he'll try to make that decision for you sometimes
<Rabi> ...but even then he's been pretty respectful with 'sharing' actually
<Claude> ...BUT THEN HE ENDS UP SPONTANEOUSLY COMBUSTING
<Rabi> sob
<Claude> haha he gets to make decisions and he can't do it
<Claude> :(
<Rabi> they both kinda fail at decisions
<Claude> HIS OWN PUNISHMENT
<Claude> yeah
<Rabi> rabi can make decisions like lets go this way, lets act this way, lets be friendly
<Rabi> but sucks at real decisions like
<Claude> "oh fuck a high-wire situation JUST WALK AWAY~"
<Rabi> how to deal with death and BREAKING etc
* Rabi IGNORES IGNORES IGNORES ITS ALL OKAY
<Claude> ...see claude's problem is
<Claude> ...
<Claude> okay
<Claude> if claude had never met rabi
<Rabi> god forbid
<Claude> he probably would've adopted rabi's way of dealing
<Claude> with this
<Rabi> ...ppfftthahaha
<Claude> :(
<Rabi> whyzat
<Claude> SMILE AND PRETEND IT'S ALL OKAY
<Claude> cause
<Claude> it's
<Claude> easier
<Rabi> ISNT IT \o/
<Claude> than facing up to THE TRUUUUTH
<Rabi> but I guess seeing Rabi do it and all...
<Claude> y-yeah
<Claude> and it's hilarious cause
<Claude> that time when Claude was all YOU SHOULDN'T HIDE BEHIND A SMILE at Rabi he. really hadn't had to deal with any
<Claude> uh
<Claude> ...what do you call what happened on Day 31
<Claude> ...
<Claude> HOPELESS SITUATIONS before
<Rabi> hahaha yeah
<Claude> like
<Rabi> PRETTY HOPELESS
<Claude> HE WAS TALKING OUT OF HIS NAIVE WHITEBREAD ASS :(
<Rabi> actually the saddest part was for rabi it wasnt ENTIRELY hopeless he probably would have won
<Rabi> if he didnt ask for lucky to be spared
<Rabi> but cepheus is full of retarded and sacrificing
<Claude> yeah I
<Claude> ...you know claude thinks you would've done that for anyone who didn't wanna die :(
<Claude> not just girls
<Claude> though lol othar
<Rabi> It would depend on the person
<Rabi> I think he wouldn't have with ya know
<Rabi> Zack
<Rabi> or Othar
<Rabi> or someone older than him
<Claude> yeah zack
<Rabi> but for like allen or scowl he would
<Rabi> he wouldnt for thorfinn
<Claude> I think if it came down to rabi or zack
<Claude> maybe claude would've actually voted for zack
<Rabi> Rabi woulda lived
<Rabi> cuz rabi is actually scared of dying
<Rabi> a lot
<Rabi> Because like uhm I think Peter brought up in main chan
<Claude> but partly because nothing seemed to happen when claude put false votes in he thought "right I can keep doing this :/"
<Rabi> PERFECT MEMORY = VIVID RECOLLECTIONS
<Claude> s-sob
<Claude> I THINK CLAUDE HAS FIGURED THAT AT SOME POINT
<Rabi> But he also hates seeing other people die because HE RECALLS THAT VIVIDLY TOO he can't win
<Rabi> yeah in one of your things you went lol nightmares
<Rabi> Rabi has awful nightmares
<Claude> ;;
<Rabi> He prefers to nap instead of long sleeps, less dreams that way
<Claude> haha after this so will claude
<Claude> but his will be more like
<Claude> dreams of possible future killgames
<Rabi> DUSKY VERSUS SPIKY
<Rabi> NIGHTMARE MODE
<Claude> HAHAHA :(
<Claude> day 33 he'll probably wake up crying
<Rabi> ;.; bro
<Rabi> bro so broken
<Claude> WHAT DO YOU DO IN AN IMPOSSIBLE SITUATION even with what allen said how do you. cheat. In this kind of thing.
<Claude> how do you cheat omnipotent cheaters :(
<Rabi> YOU CANT
<Claude> EXACTLY
<Rabi> rabi is all uugghh cuz Allen is like PROMISE TO NEVER BREAK
<Rabi> and he's like christ that'd be such a huge lie even *I* have problems saying it
<Claude> ....bro ._.
<Rabi> Cuz ya know Rabi's very...sensible. Like he has ANGER and FEELINGS but he recognizes a hopeless and helpless situation when he sees it
<Rabi> Which is why he didn't get riled up during the game
<Rabi> Getting mad wouldnt help and just make him hurt himself because he'd wanna punch shit if he got worked up
<Claude> yeah claude is actually pretty sensible even if he can't be unemotional about it
<Claude> which is why he can't just buy into allen's "SO WHAT" solution so easily
<Rabi> They've also been in way more kill games
<Claude> because then he still has to solve the situation directly :(
<Rabi> and claude especially has. seen rabi die a lot
<Claude> actually
<Rabi> no wait you have missed some huh
<Claude> going back
<Rabi> the eye thing sob
<Claude> he saw you die once
<Claude> he missed the eye thing but HEARD ABOUT IT
<Rabi> that scared him a lot the eye one
<Claude> even if no one would tell him how exactly it happened
<Rabi> and he was so terrified that he'd get the brain parasites in that game sob
<Claude> and then third trickster game he died :(
<Claude> lol yeah
<Rabi> cuz his brain is his importantest part
<Claude> claude doesn't have a grudge against rezo cause. it was probably the best option on the list left.
<Rabi> BRAIN AND EYES
<Rabi> NEED
<Claude> broooo ;;
<Rabi> right now rabi is so worried about claude
<Claude> rabi knows he didn't actually vote for anyone in the end right
<Claude> or did he not clarify that
<Rabi> Rabi figures as much
<Rabi> or something
<Rabi> well no he saw you 'voting'
<Rabi> hmm
<Claude> but then when he woke up claude mentioned that he thought you got screwed over cause 'he didn't vote'
<Claude> though
<Rabi> hmm then he knows for sure
<Claude> you could take that either as 'didn't vote at all' or 'didn't vote in the first stages'
<Rabi> and would assum rude notes
<Claude> trickster makes claude so rude :(
<Claude> HE STARTED AS A NICE BOY
<Rabi> ...I think thats the least of your problems bro
<Claude> ...shhh the least are the easiest to address
<Rabi> :|
<Rabi> SO BACK TO YOUR BREAKING
<Claude> YES WELL
<Claude> I FIGURE HE WILL AT LEAST DECIDE or has already decided THAT HE CAN'T BREAK COMPLETELY
<Claude> cause that would hurt rabi
<Claude> and like
<Rabi> They're both hanging on entirely because of each other
<Claude> ...CODEPENDENCY ACHIEVES NEXT LEVEL /o/
<Claude> yeah like
<Claude> ...man I just keep quoting that manga except
<Claude> Claude is a weak guy
<Claude> but he'll do his best to be strong if there's someone counting on him to
<Claude> and he knows that if he let himself become something different from what he is, it would affect others
<Claude> and he's afraid that here, "something different" would be closer and closer to That Claude
<Rabi> The WTF Hurting Red Claude?
<Claude> (yes tavi told him IT'S PROBABLY ENTIRELY MADE UP but it still scared the hell out of him to see a Himself like that)
<Claude> yeah :(
<Claude> and
<Claude> ...if he lets himself think about it now he might even be able to see how he could turn out that way
<Claude> "if I stopped caring about people getting hurt"
<Rabi> oh bro
<Rabi> You're too introspective :(
<Claude> "if I just got focused on getting things over with"
<Claude> ...hey he's not normally introspective cause he keeps hiumself busy :(
<Claude> but he's had ALL NIGHT LONG to mull to himself
<Rabi> YOU SHOULDA SLEPT :(
<Claude> while waiting for surgeon
<Claude> WHAT IF SURGEON SHOWED UP :(
<Claude> AND I WAS ASLEEP
<Claude> AND HE WAS LIKE "oh I'll come back later"
<Rabi> ...bro orz
<Claude> he wanted you back asap okay ._.
<Rabi> :(
<Claude> for one thing he had no idea how long dusky could be distracted
<Claude> :(
<Rabi> so he's worried if he doesnt do things the same retarded way he's doing things
<Rabi> he'll become psychotic
<Claude> ...it might take a long time or a very long time
<Claude> but he doesn't want to become jaded
<Claude> or hmm how do I put this
<Rabi> in words i hope
<Claude> ...what were you expecting dance
<Rabi> an artisic rendering?
<Rabi> this dark circle represents depair
<Claude> here you can work with this
<Claude> http://www.pixiv.net/member_illust.php?mode=medium&illust_id=2449010
<Claude> but no I WILL TRY TO WORDS
<Claude> okay if he doesn't do things the same retarded way he'd been doing things
<Claude> he worries he'll start getting used to it
<Rabi> ...like his retarded bro?
<Claude> and that will change who he is ONE STEP CLOSER TO PSYCHOTIC maybe but when he thinks about that BAD END he starts slamming down the 'can't do that red will break' partition
<Claude> ...he's sure his retarded bro feels it under there :(
<Rabi> Cling to sanity for my sake \o/
<Claude> and added with the fact that the old "everyone revives straight after" standby has been shaken
<Rabi> rabi got stiff like a normal dead body
<Claude> dying in a game is now more serious than ever
<Rabi> it was probably very creepy \o/
<Claude> ....oh god
<Claude> he probably had to forcibly rearrange your limbs :(
<Claude> at some point
<Claude> OKAY I NEED TO RUN TO CHURCH AND DINNER DATE NOW be back in hours CONTINUE LATER?
<Rabi> SURE
<Claude> <333333333
<Rabi> FARE THEE WELL
<Claude> SHOULD BE BACK BY ELEVEN
<Claude> which is your five iirc
<Claude|out> o>
<Claude> WHERE WAS I
<Claude> uh
<Almaz> I DUNNO
<Claude> ...RIGHT
<Claude> HE WILL CLING TO SANITY FOR YOUR SAKE is the first conclusion
<Claude> :<b
<Almaz> YES
<Claude> but the problem is how
<Claude> IT IS ANOTHER PARADOX
<Claude> letting things not destroy his sanity = becoming numb = becoming NOT-HIM
<Claude> man maybe he needs to find an outlet or something for this :<a
<Almaz> Punching Nora?
<Claude> ...also to be honest he's not exactly unafraid of death either
<Claude> he's not that jesusy
<Claude> but so far he's been lucky enough not to actually go through a horrible one
<Claude> so it's not so prominent yet
<Almaz> hahahaha and rabi hasn't died too horribly has he
<Almaz> in front of him, anyway
<Claude> PROBABLY IF HE DIES IN A BAD WAY in future it will....make decisions even more complicated
<Claude> YOU BLED OUT
<Claude> AND HE HEARD THE OTHER ONE WAS BAD
<Claude> >(
<Almaz> YOU DIDNT SEE IT LA LA LA
<Claude> DON'T THINK I DON'T KNOW IT BOTHERS YOU :(
<Almaz> YOU DONT :D
<Claude> YOU DON'T SLEEP WELL
<Almaz> ....SO?
<Claude> ...SO YOU'RE BOTHERED :(
<Almaz> ANYWAY YOUR TRAUMA
<Claude> YEAH MY TRAUMA
<Claude> IT HURTS MY BRAIN
<Claude> AND ALLEN IS NAIVE :(
<Almaz> daaawww
<Claude> actually a short sum up would be
<Claude> <Rabi> so he's worried if he doesnt do things the same retarded way he's doing things <Rabi> he'll become psychotic
<Claude> but if he does do things the same retarded way he's doing things
<Claude> he'll...still... go crazy
<Claude> but he can't
<Almaz> ...lol epic fail
<Claude> but he might eventually
<Claude> but he can't!!!
<Claude> SOMETHING HAS TO GIVE :(
<Claude> ...shut up you're no b etter
<Almaz> ...wut
<Claude> lol distracted by threads :(
<Claude> right at this point he will... do lots of things in daily life so he doesn't have to think about the dilemma!!1
<Claude> but when it comes to another trickster game
<Claude> multiple options
<Claude> a) decides WHAT IF RED DIES FOR GOOD THIS TIME and picks someone else because of it to save him at all costs
<Claude> b) gets in the damn jar himself and gets Allen or someone to make sure Rabi doesn't watch :/a
<Claude> c) freezes again
<Almaz> s..sob
<Claude> d) picks whoever he's told to so he can avoid making the choice (lol)
<Almaz> rabi so doesn't wanna die again
<Almaz> but! claude and dusky!
<Claude> e) picks someone on his own accord and hates himself for it
<Claude> YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO DIE AGAIN FOR A LONG LONG TIME
<Claude> 8(
<Almaz> He WOULD prefer that
<Claude> I think at this point b) is the most likely option
<Claude> if possible
<Claude> :/a
<Claude> cause YOU DIE TOO MUCH
<Claude> and
<Claude> idk he'd still hate himself a lot cause then he'd be putting you in HIS position
<Almaz> Rabi would...respect Claude's decision to do it but not like it
<Claude> of having to pick people :(
<Almaz> Rabi could handle it way better
<Claude> but he thinks you're stronger
<Claude> in that sense
<Almaz> He's not stronger so much as he can just
<Almaz> turn it off easier
<Claude> or maybe just really good at pretending HE IS NOT SURE
<Claude> ...haha then he'd feel horrible for doing things that you can only deal with by turning it off
<Claude> IS THERE NO WAY TO WIN THIS
<Almaz> yeah I can imagine him like realizing rabi is acting like he did the first time he saw the pillar
<Almaz> and being like SHIT SHIT
<Almaz> maybe allen will punch me for you
<Claude> it's not maybe
<Claude> I trust he will :(
<Claude> do I save your body and mind or your heart, bro
<Claude> sob
<Almaz> ...o..oh claude hahahaha
<Claude> SO IMPORTANT TO HIM
<Claude> he's in an unknown world for an unknown reason and everything is new
<Claude> to survive he needs peopleeee
<Claude> friendss
<Almaz> RABI WILL...........MANAGE
<Claude> because they give him a reason to wake up in the morning
<Claude> .:(
<Claude> WORST CASE SCENARIO: Claude is abandoned, zones out forever
<Claude> ...yeah I think the only conclusion he can firmly accept right now is "can't break, red and dusky need me"
<Almaz> we're so dependent
<Claude> and work around that
<Claude> yeah we are :(
<Almaz> l..lol
<Claude> HOW DID THIS HAPPEN
<Claude> it is a beautiful thing and also a terrible thing
<Almaz> WELL what else do they have
<Almaz> in other teams its all kinda spread out
<Almaz> while theyre kinda only can depend on each other
<Almaz> cuz it was...dusky and silver
<Claude> ...true :<a
<Almaz> So they were relying on each other a lot
<Claude> two other members who are more dependents than dependable
<Almaz> Yeah so they kinda did...have to be parent types
<Almaz> and act as a unit together
<Claude> it actually was a pretty healthy dependency but at this rate it might develop into a stronger unhealthier one
<Claude> if it isn't already
<Claude> cause of all the pressure :(
<Almaz> I dunno, they need SOMETHING to cling to
<Almaz> and at least we OOCly know like
<Almaz> neither of them will pillar
<Almaz> ever
<Almaz> Which would be the thing that'd really destroy either of them
<Almaz> as long as they keep coming back they can keep pushing on
<Claude> yeah :<
<Claude> DON'T PILLAR OKAY
<Claude> ...okay I think I'm ready to go back to allen's thread now
<Claude> sob
<Claude> THANK YOU BRO
<Almaz> NO PROB
